Loving your work is possible
You know that feeling of new love. The birds are singing, the flowers are blooming and you feel like all is well in the world. It’s a feeling we search for in life and also in work. It may sound a little Pollyanna, but what if you really could love your job—or even like it just a little more?
You can, and a new study suggests the starting point is sharing in a new way. Here’s why.
One of the fundamentals of love, is the feeling of being fully known, and of course it applies to workplace. Feeling known at work is the experience of colleagues who understand our idiosyncrasies and like us anyway. It is the project team where we can contribute fully because people appreciate our strengths. It is the leader who taps us for a promotion because s/he sees our potential.
But how can we bring our true selves—and our whole selves—to work?
A recent study by Rice University tells us people who divulged key elements of themselves at work reported greater happiness, productivity, commitment and job satisfaction in addition to less anxiety. That sounds like a panacea. But, my recommendation isn’t to make the mistake of an overshare. TMI (too much information) is still too much information, especially at work.
Like so much in life, it’s a balance. Here are a few recommendations:
Listen And Ask Questions Of Others
Listen to others, ask questions and be genuinely interested in your coworkers. This starts a positive pathway toward more openness generally. The more interested you are in others, the more they will share with you and open the door to a closer relationship.
Share Yourself
It seems obvious, but to be known, it is helpful to share more about yourself and what makes you tick. This doesn’t have to be intense or an all-at-once proposition. You can share a bit of yourself at a time. Share your personal stories, interests and bits of detail. As you share, others will tend to share more as well, and you can begin a positive share loop where you are building relationships with others—ultimately you can share more of your authentic self.
Ask For Feedback
The cognitive psychological framework of the Johari Window suggests that in addition to open sharing which leads to more connectedness with colleagues, we can also reduce our blind spots by asking for feedback. Blind spots are characteristics about ourselves that others see but of which we are unaware—that annoying habit that drives our team crazy or the nervous tendency that distracts the audience when we’re making a presentation. The more we’re open to feedback, the more we can know ourselves and manage our behaviors.
Accept Others And Yourself
Accepting others and all their imperfections or eccentricities builds relationships and connections. It also creates the conditions for you to be increasingly accepted by others as well.
In the popular love story, The Bridges of Madison County, the lead character leaves a diary which allows her adult children to know her more deeply—including some surprising secrets. While you certainly wouldn’t want your coworkers to read your diary, to be known is a fundamental part of love.
After all, loving your job connects directly to feeling like you can fully be yourself there. To know others and to be known ourselves can contribute to greater happiness and fulfillment in our work. What’s not to love about that?
