BETA
This is a BETA experience. You may opt-out by clicking here

More From Forbes

Edit Story

Five Emotional Intelligence Insights For Leading People Older Than You At Work

Forbes Coaches Council

Abiola Salami is a performance strategist (CHAMP) providing valuable insights to high-performing professionals, entrepreneurs & politicians.

The workplace today is composed of five generations, and available research shows that, generally, the younger workforce, including Millenials (born between 1981 and 2000) and Generation Z (born between 2001 and 2020), are increasingly filling the workplace. They tend to have a different worldview when compared to older colleagues.

With some members of this younger workforce finding themselves in roles where they have to lead people older than themselves, emotional intelligence can help these younger people successfully navigate the waters in the quest for peak performance. The intersection of the three Rs—respect, results and responsibilities—becomes necessary because one can’t be selected at the expense of the others. The following are emotionally intelligent tips that younger people can deploy when leading people older than them in the workplace.

1. Deal with any of your stereotypes and insecurities about other generations.

Without much thought, it is easy to find ourselves projecting our prejudiced, ill-informed and insecure narratives about those in older demographics onto them. The first step you must take is to acknowledge the possibility that you might be wrong, which should be followed by the willingness to unlearn, learn and relearn any such notion. By stereotyping older colleagues, we fall into the trap known as the fallacy of generalization—where you paint a group of people with the same brush based on a notion or previous (and often unpleasant) experience.

For example, not all older generations are set in their ways—many are young at heart and willing to embrace new challenges. You can erroneously assume that someone from an older generation may not be able to withstand the rigors of a task only to find out that such activities are what they thrive at. We need to treat all people on a person-by-person basis, and we may be surprised by how most of our myths will be debunked.

2. Get to understand their communication patterns, work styles and personalities.

We are all a product of our times. That conditioning usually spills over to the workplace, the pace at which we get things done, our style and the tone of our communication, among other traits. You may find that most such idiosyncrasies are a matter of style—not character defects or incompetence. Over time you may inspire older colleagues to a different approach, but this should be done with empathy.

As an example, a person who was a member of the clergy or was otherwise accustomed to speaking with authority may come to the workplace and struggle to reckon with the leadership of a younger person who may be leading the team. Fortunately, if as a younger person you have solid social skills, you are equipped to handle such situations.

3. Use a compelling vision to get everyone on the same page.

There has to be a big picture that is greater than anybody’s ego in the workplace. This is what a vision does: it demands that everyone puts aside every other consideration and gets all hands on deck. Once you can cast a powerful vision that is aspirational, it becomes the most important compelling force in the workplace—which unites every demographic, among other things. A vision makes people focus more on their roles in the workplace and what part they have to play in the success of the organization instead of elevating pedestrian sentiments.

As a leader, if, for example, you have your sights set on your organization becoming the most successful within the industry it operates in and you effectively communicate that to the team, everyone will not only envisage the collective success to be achieved but also how their personal fortunes will improve when the vision actualizes. Hence, they will get their ducks in a row and double down on their efforts.

4. Have the courage to be vulnerable with older people.

As a leader, there may be the temptation to put up a wall of invincibility and an impenetrable demeanor in your interactions, perhaps especially with people older than you. From my personal observation, some young CEOs have an unconscious feeling of superiority over some of their older workforce because these CEOs became successful at a young age.

This mindset will rob you of gaining genuine connections with people you need in achieving the overarching vision of the organization. It takes a level of vulnerability to relate with people in a way that they see you in a more human light as opposed to just being a leader or team member in the workplace.

By letting the people you lead know that you’re not immune to mistakes yourself, you effectively diffuse the tension that surrounds tasks where team members are apprehensive of a leader’s outburst when they fall short of a target. Imagine if you told your line managers that you struggled to grasp a new technology; it would definitely build up their belief in themselves that a bad start isn’t necessarily a bad thing.

5. Earn respect through generosity with your time, energy, encouragement and useful feedback.

As a young leader, one of your primary concerns may be how to earn respect from older colleagues. You need to be a giver at the workplace—a contributor to the success of others. Your support can come in various forms; even something as little as a smile can do the trick. If your strength is writing, you can offer editorial support to colleagues when they are preparing business documents.

You should seek to enhance the value of what your team members bring to the table, whether through constructive feedback, physical support, technical support or even more pronounced collaborative efforts. The importance of being a great team player cannot be over-emphasized; your team needs you as much as you need them.

Most times, people who are immersed in a situation are blinded to certain things, but if you can maintain a clear vantage point, you can support your team by pointing out those useful observations. By being a cheerleader for others, you show that you’re invested in their success. You also earn respect when your leadership comes in handy on highly sensitive issues.


Forbes Coaches Council is an invitation-only community for leading business and career coaches. Do I qualify?


Follow me on Twitter or LinkedInCheck out my website