Charles Dickens once wrote, “No one is useless in this world who lightens the burdens of another.” Being selfless has an impact on others and creates a ripple effect throughout the world. Everyone has value and can contribute in this way.
I want to tell you about a friend of mine named Ben, from whom I learned this principle. Ben and I met a few years back on the tennis court. He is one of the purest, most genuine and giving people I have ever met. He is so selfless that the second he meets you, he is looking for ways to determine if and how he can help.
Ben is one of those people who can make you feel like you are the only person on the planet when you speak with him. He remembers everything you tell him and catalogs things for future opportunities to help. Never does he look for personal gain, other than the satisfaction of making someone happy.
About a year and a half after I met Ben, he was diagnosed with a disease called multiple myeloma, a very rare form of cancer. His concept and philosophy in his life never changed, even when he was battling for his own life. Up until the end, he would always look for ways to determine if and how he could help others.
My good friend Ben impacted my life forever. Although Ben lost his fight, his concepts and genuine approach to helping other people have been ingrained in me indefinitely.
Being giving of yourself is in no way a new concept. It has been talked about for centuries: “No one has ever become poor by giving.” “Give until it hurts and you will see the reward.”
Trust me, if you can determine if and how you can help, everything comes full circle.
You can integrate this concept into your relationships, your business, your charitable organizations and everything you do. Two basic concepts will have you well on your way.
1. Operate from a place of abundance. This frees you from the burden of feeling as if you don’t have enough to help. Many people struggle because scarcity enters their lives, and they feel they do not have enough time, money, resources, connections, energy, etc. to give.
Anything you can give has an impact. Operating from a place of abundance allows you to feel you have everything to give. It makes you a better leader personally, professionally and in the community. You become seen as a go-to person, and this behavior encourages others to follow you.
2. Be detached. Detachment is such a powerful tool. It’s the basic idea that we care more about getting it right than we do about being right. When we are detached, it means we are not in it for personal gain. We are driving toward no specific outcome other than to help.
This is a hard concept for many to grasp because we are conditioned in business and in life to look out for ourselves. This is why detachment is so powerful. It shifts the paradigm in all our interactions. When you are a leader or member of a team, it allows those around you to see you as someone who genuinely cares about the best outcome. This breeds trust and strengthens relationships.
Both abundance and detachment feel unnatural. But like any muscle, they can be trained. Remind yourself before you enter into an interaction that you have unlimited resources to give and ultimately care most about getting it right. This simple reminder will put you in the right frame of mind to exist in the if-and-how mindset.
Try integrating this principle into just one interaction per day, which will accumulate to 365 interactions per year. Imagine the impact of all the selfless, abundant and detached giving you can offer and the effect it will have on your world.
