CEO and Founder, The EQ-i Coach; author of Emotion at Work: Unleashing the Secret Power of Emotional Intelligence; public speaker and coach
getty
During a time when both employees and employers are forced to consider what it is that truly matters in the workplace amid the Great Resignation, all signs point to one simple answer: the way we treat people. We have never been more aware of others’ actions and words, all while employees are paying special attention to how their bosses treat them. Stand out from the crowd of less than average bosses with these three best practices to prioritize your people as it relates to emotional intelligence.
1. Go out of your way to communicate HR policies.
One of my clients recently burned out from the heavy workload she shouldered. She gave the company she was leaving more than adequate notice because she wanted to be considerate to her teammates.
During this period, she took no time off and expected to be compensated for unused paid time off in her last paycheck. Even though her boss confirmed this expectation and she did everything she could to leave on good terms, she had a big shock when receiving her final paycheck. Contrary to what she had been told, she did not receive any compensation for the unused accumulated vacation days. Apparently, there was a loophole in the HR policies about paying out unused vacation only on an accrual basis—something her boss was unaware of.
Needless to say, my client now has bittersweet feelings about the way in which her leaving was handled. If the boss had gone the extra mile to ensure he knew all HR policies related to employee termination, perhaps these ill feelings could have been avoided. If she had known she would lose her vacation time, my client would have taken much-needed time off as part of the more than two weeks’ notice she gave. Instead, a rift and feelings of distrust were created between my client and her former employer.
Remember, there is no bad press worse than an employee who feels scorned. It is much better to stay friendly with people who leave than to burn a bridge.
2. Regulate your moods.
Emotions are contagious! Whether you are a happy leader or an angry one, your mood can influence everyone around you within minutes. A good leader prefers to spread passion and motivation rather than burden co-workers with anxiety or ennui. Direct reports work harder for a boss they perceive as considerate, kind, caring and respectful. In contrast, they will be less motivated if their boss is emotionally unpredictable, labile, chaotic or dramatic.
This is where understanding yourself and having good emotional self-awareness is beneficial. If you can put a label on what you are feeling in the same moment you are feeling it, you will better understand how your feelings might affect those around you. A good rule to follow: Be cautious when communicating negative emotions that might be burdensome to others (especially direct reports) and liberal about spreading good cheer.
One of my clients has an unusually stressful job with tight deadlines that could cost her company millions if she misses just one. While the decisions she makes are not exactly life or death, they could mean the loss of extremely valuable capital investments. She already has better-than-average stress tolerance; however, we are working to increase her skills to star performer status. When she knows she is facing a particularly stressful day, she will prepare her direct reports by asking for their forgiveness in advance in case she is inadvertently short with them. While she acknowledges her request is not a pass for poor behavior, it does serve to put her team on notice for the challenging day ahead.
Another one of my clients told me they recently spoke with a new boss and left the conversation feeling positive, optimistic and uplifted. Just by talking to this leader, they felt better about their job, their company and even their own life. They said it was as if they wanted to hang out with this person for hours, to stay in the feeling of joy and positivity the leader radiates. This type of boss is going to be the most successful at building and managing meaningful relationships with their direct reports.
3. Promote based on attitude rather than technical skills.
Another one of my clients is leaving his company because of how his boss chooses to give promotions. Instead of promoting employees with the highest EQ, he notices his boss doing the opposite. It seems those being promoted have lower EQ than other candidates. This strategy has caused stress and discord amongst team members, and my client felt he had no choice but to leave the company. Fortunately, he was able to find a company whose mission and values champion career promotion based on high EQ.
Company culture should be healthy and holistic from the top down to support high potentials who have excellent EQ. Expectations for positive attitudes must be spelled out in competency models and carried out in good leadership behavior. When this is not the case, it might be best to leave and start fresh somewhere else.
When taking the time to audit your leadership approach, keep these three best practices in mind and strive to be as highly emotionally intelligent as you possibly can. You will be amazed at the things you and your team accomplish when you do.
Forbes Coaches Council is an invitation-only community for leading business and career coaches. Do I qualify?
