Founder, The Leaders' Kitchen Inc. Growing leaders, teams, results & joy! Team coaching, leadership development, change leadership.
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As a CEO or executive leader, what is one important thing you learned about yourself in your role? What did you learn about others? How did your learning contribute to accountability and results? In our R.E.S.U.L.T.S. Model, we define learning as “learning about ourselves and our relationship with others supports growth that is enriched by our success, failures and feedback.” In the sixth part of this eight-part series on generating results and joy through accountability and clarity, I will examine the connection between learning about self and others and generating results through stories about real leaders.
The First-Time CEO
The new CEO of a mid-sized firm learned that he was not as conscious as he wanted to be about his words and tone and their impact. He contravened the very values and associated behaviors he and his team had recently defined when he made some comments that rubbed his executive team the wrong way.
I asked him how much he thought his key leaders would trust him if he didn’t consistently live the defined values, recognizing that he too is human and would have occasional gaps. He learned that his team observed his behavior more closely now that he was CEO and expected him to consistently live their values. He learned how easily his words could damage trust and relationships. That very day he changed his approach.
When there was a gap in expectations on a job or a problem in a relationship, he explored the issue, communicated expectations and ensured his words and tone aligned with company values. And he has grown the company, even during challenging economic times and has garnered great respect internally and externally.
What did you learn about yourself when you were a new CEO? How did this support you to grow into your role? What have you learned about others from your CEO vantage point? How did your learnings contribute to success, failure and results?
The New Executive Leader
During turbulent times with high uncertainty, an executive leader found that she needed to learn quickly to lead through unprecedented complexity and rapid change to support her team through their emotional ups and downs relating to the rapid changes in the business. At the time she was experiencing a great deal of personal change, too. But she needed to be steady and supportive with her people, hence she sought her own support elsewhere.
For her, this didn’t mean she could not be real but that she needed her people to know that she was there to support them so that they would be well and continue to feel fulfilled in their work. She also needed to know more about her people and their needs during these challenging times. Through support groups she established, some of which she led, she got to know her people even better and could therefore respond more quickly to their emerging needs. Her team continues to provide excellent care for their clients and grow the company across the country.
When you and your business face turbulent times, how do you get the support you need to lead through it? What works best in how you support your people through high uncertainty? How has your learning contributed to failing fast in order to succeed?
My Own Learning
When leading a team accountability coaching engagement with an executive team, I found key leaders were not having necessary conversations, therefore presenting a significant accountability gap. After our team coaching session, my co-facilitator asked permission to give me feedback. She said: “Marguerite, I’ve noticed that you’re a bit off. I appreciate you’re grieving the death of your sister and just wanted to check in to see how you are and if you’re aware that you were a bit short today.” I thanked my partner for the mirror she held up.
I learned that I had experienced an unexpected wave of grief that day and I was not as open-hearted as usual, potentially damaging relationships. I learned about the key leaders that they would need more support than anticipated to model having vital conversations. And, I practiced compassion for self and others. I shared my experience with the team and apologized for my uncharacteristic abruptness with a commitment to support them in a stronger way. Ultimately, this executive team’s coaching results included having developed the vital conversations skills and practice that would carry them through the challenging weeks and months of rapid decision-making and adjustment required by Covid-19.
What have you learned about preparing your emotional state to best lead your people or support your clients during unsettled times? Why was this important to you? How do you address accountability gaps with your people?
Learning about self helps leaders deepen their relationship to self and make adjustments. Learning about others and what matters to them also informs how we develop relationships and lead. Our failures and successes contribute to our learning about ourselves, about others and about how to generate results and joy.
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