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I met up with the wonderful Jennifer Peepas of Captain Awkward while she was in town and it was lovely! We decided to collaborate on answering a few questions together, and this is the first of two posts from that joint effort. . Can I talk about my boyfriend’s other girlfriend at work? “Adam” is dating both me and “Jane,” and we all live together. MORE
A reader writes: In August, I made the decision to begin a job search. After spending seven years with the same organization, I felt it was time for me to leave when it became increasingly clear that I would not get promoted, partially due to a lack of movement within the organization and partially because according to my boss, we did not have the money to give me a promotion (where I work, raises are tied to promotions). MORE
A reader writes: I’m an HR administrator at a company with about 150 people across a few offices. I’m the only on-site HR person at my location, which has about 25 employees. Our office is entirely open plan, with the exception of a few fish-bowl style, glass-walled conference rooms. MORE
If you’re like most people, your resume is … not great. That’s not because your work history is bad or your accomplishments aren’t impressive (you are undoubtedly Very Impressive). It’s because you suck at writing a resume. Most of us do. It’s hard to be good at something you probably only do once every few years at most – and which requires you to sell yourself in a weird, unnatural-feeling way. MORE
It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. Everyone got laid off except for me. I work for a small business (3-5 employees) and I had known the company was having some financial trouble for some time. Everyone in my office got laid off except for me. MORE
A reader writes: I’ve battled an eating disorder my whole life and it tends to come on when I am experiencing stress in situations that are out of my control. I recently ended my relationship with my fiancé of nine years which, as a result, triggered me to lapse back into old behavior. I thankfully saw the signs and took measures to try to alleviate the situation (not going to the gym, increasing my visits to my therapist, reaching out to friends and family for support, etc.). MORE
A reader writes: I’ve been at my current job for two years, and have been doing … okay. No big issues, but in previous reviews my boss has talked about me in terms of good, not great. I’m definitely struggling with efficiency, and am generally bored and disengaged. MORE
It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. I just started a new job — and then got a PhD offer from my dream school. I started a new job six weeks ago. It’s at my alma mater and it’s an incredible place to work. The culture is awesome and I love my colleagues. MORE
It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. My employee misdirected an email criticizing her problem coworker — who saw it and quit. I have two direct reports who can’t stand each other but they’ve managed to be civil and professional. MORE
It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. Who should clean the disgusting office fridge? I work at a small company with offices spread out through town and in my office there is just me and my coworker. Our boss works remotely from another state and comes in every few months. MORE
It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. My coworkers say we shouldn’t attend the work party we were invited to. I am a new youngish admin in a law firm that is extremely hierarchical and old school. My department’s practice group leader (PGL, the head of a certain practice in a firm) is hosting a year-end party for our department at his home, which is out of the way for the administrative staff, though most of the attorneys live on the same block. MORE
It’s the Thursday “ask the readers” question. MORE
It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. Should I hire an ex? My company is starting a massive and complex two-year project, which I am managing, and I’ve been given approval to hire a small support staff. We advertised publicly but after interviews we haven’t found a suitable candidate for the position which is probably most critical. Rather than advertise again given the urgency, we’ve been asked to tap our networks for candidates to interview. MORE
A reader writes: I recently started my first “real” job in a small office (eight people). We have strategy meetings every morning for about 30-45 minutes. My boss is REALLY intolerant of bad ideas. MORE
It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. Coworker saw embarrassing content on my phone. I work in a small department library at a university, and came in to catch up on some work while the office was closed over the holidays. MORE
This comment section is open for any non-work-related discussion you’d like to have with other readers, by popular demand. This one is truly no work and no school.). Book recommendation of the week: Such a Fun Age , by Kiley Reid. MORE
It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. I think I’m about to become a receptionist against my will. A few months ago, I started a new job in an administrative but non-reception role. MORE
And now for a word from a sponsor… Tax season is soon to be upon us – and if you’re a small business, you know what paperwork hassles it can bring. Blue Summit Supplies is a really useful one-stop tax resource for small businesses. MORE
A reader writes: I started on staff at a small environmental/conservation nonprofit. My coworkers and I are PR, fundraising, and outreach staff. All of us are brand new due to turnover. Today we received an email from our boss that says: “When we are traveling for work, we try, when possible, to stay at a state park — cabins in the winter, camping ‘normally’ in the summer since most cabins are booked for a week. MORE
A reader writes: I caught my employee skipping work to nap at home when she said she was meeting with a potential client. It was total happenstance — I happened to meet the potential client at a social event that night. When I asked my employee the next day why the potential client had no idea who I was or what our company did, the truth came out: she hadn’t met with anyone, she’d gone home to take a break and a nap. MORE
Foster cat Humphrey (on couch) is tolerating resident cats taking over his room. This comment section is open for any non-work-related discussion you’d like to have with other readers, by popular demand. This one is truly no work and no school.). MORE
A reader writes: I’m starting a new job in a week and a bit, my first after finishing my PhD. I’m wondering how much stuff it’s acceptable to “move in with” on the first day. I’ve seen the space, it’s a large-ish desk in a three-person office. MORE
A reader writes: I have a colleague who I depend on for data for a recurring project. Every time the update is due, I schedule check-in meetings weeks in advance and make it explicitly clear that I need X by [date] and Y by [date]. And every. single. MORE
To all the marketing people who keep emailing me pitches where they call grown women “girl bosses”: This is gross and sexist and you should stop. They’re women, not girls. And the default for “boss” is not male. Boss” covers all genders. You don’t need to modify it with gender, just like you wouldn’t (one hopes) say “girl pilot” or “girl lawyer.”. Or “boy boss.”. MORE
It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. Should you mention an employee’s smell during a reference check? A few years back, I managed an employee who was on a performance plan and was on the verge of being let go. MORE
A reader writes: I manage employees who start with a three-month probationary period. I have a current probationary employee who has not taken direction well, has acted defensively and challenged basic instructions about how to do his job, has rolled his eyes when provided with feedback on how to do certain tasks, and ironically who has also sought me out for instructions in situations where the course of action for him to take should have been immediately obvious. MORE
It’s “where are you now?” month at Ask a Manager, and all December I’m running updates from people who had their letters here answered in the past. Remember the letter-writer who took care of her company’s ducks and that’s all anyone asked her about ? Here’s the update. MORE
Here is the second post in the collaboration I did with Jennifer Peepas from CaptainAwkward. Part one is here. Everyone in the office is hanging out without me and it feels like high school. I work in a very clique-y office where I am just not in the main clique. MORE
A reader writes: I am a fairly easygoing person with one major weakness: I cannot handle it when men are condescending. After years of weathering many insufferable male friends, colleagues, boyfriends, and family members, I have simply had a lifetime’s fill of being condescended to. My tolerance has reached its limit. Now, when men in my personal life condescend to me, I get angry and fight back. MORE
Ask a Manager
FEBRUARY 12, 2020
Here is the second post in the collaboration I did with Jennifer Peepas from CaptainAwkward. Part one is here. Everyone in the office is hanging out without me and it feels like high school. I work in a very clique-y office where I am just not in the main clique.
Ask a Manager
FEBRUARY 13, 2020
It’s the Thursday “ask the readers” question.
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Ask a Manager
FEBRUARY 10, 2020
I met up with the wonderful Jennifer Peepas of Captain Awkward while she was in town and it was lovely! We decided to collaborate on answering a few questions together, and this is the first of two posts from that joint effort. . Can I talk about my boyfriend’s other girlfriend at work? “Adam” is dating both me and “Jane,” and we all live together.
Ask a Manager
FEBRUARY 4, 2020
A reader writes: I recently started my first “real” job in a small office (eight people). We have strategy meetings every morning for about 30-45 minutes. My boss is REALLY intolerant of bad ideas.
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Ask a Manager
FEBRUARY 17, 2020
A reader writes: I’m starting a new job in a week and a bit, my first after finishing my PhD. I’m wondering how much stuff it’s acceptable to “move in with” on the first day. I’ve seen the space, it’s a large-ish desk in a three-person office.
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Ask a Manager
FEBRUARY 16, 2020
It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. My employee misdirected an email criticizing her problem coworker — who saw it and quit. I have two direct reports who can’t stand each other but they’ve managed to be civil and professional.
Ask a Manager
FEBRUARY 17, 2020
It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. I think I’m about to become a receptionist against my will. A few months ago, I started a new job in an administrative but non-reception role.
Ask a Manager
FEBRUARY 12, 2020
A reader writes: I’m an HR administrator at a company with about 150 people across a few offices. I’m the only on-site HR person at my location, which has about 25 employees. Our office is entirely open plan, with the exception of a few fish-bowl style, glass-walled conference rooms.
Ask a Manager
FEBRUARY 13, 2020
It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. Should you mention an employee’s smell during a reference check? A few years back, I managed an employee who was on a performance plan and was on the verge of being let go.
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Ask a Manager
FEBRUARY 13, 2020
A reader writes: I’ve been at my current job for two years, and have been doing … okay. No big issues, but in previous reviews my boss has talked about me in terms of good, not great. I’m definitely struggling with efficiency, and am generally bored and disengaged.
Ask a Manager
FEBRUARY 14, 2020
It’s the Friday open thread! The comment section on this post is open for discussion with other readers on anything work-related that you want to talk about. If you want an answer from me, emailing me is still your best bet*, but this is a chance to talk to other readers. *
Ask a Manager
DECEMBER 31, 2019
It’s “where are you now?” month at Ask a Manager, and all December I’m running updates from people who had their letters here answered in the past. Remember the letter-writer who took care of her company’s ducks and that’s all anyone asked her about ? Here’s the update.
Ask a Manager
FEBRUARY 12, 2020
It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. I just started a new job — and then got a PhD offer from my dream school. I started a new job six weeks ago. It’s at my alma mater and it’s an incredible place to work. The culture is awesome and I love my colleagues.
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Ask a Manager
FEBRUARY 15, 2020
Foster cat Humphrey (on couch) is tolerating resident cats taking over his room. This comment section is open for any non-work-related discussion you’d like to have with other readers, by popular demand. This one is truly no work and no school.).
Ask a Manager
FEBRUARY 3, 2020
A reader writes: In August, I made the decision to begin a job search. After spending seven years with the same organization, I felt it was time for me to leave when it became increasingly clear that I would not get promoted, partially due to a lack of movement within the organization and partially because according to my boss, we did not have the money to give me a promotion (where I work, raises are tied to promotions).
Ask a Manager
JANUARY 21, 2020
A reader writes: I started on staff at a small environmental/conservation nonprofit. My coworkers and I are PR, fundraising, and outreach staff. All of us are brand new due to turnover. Today we received an email from our boss that says: “When we are traveling for work, we try, when possible, to stay at a state park — cabins in the winter, camping ‘normally’ in the summer since most cabins are booked for a week.
Ask a Manager
JANUARY 15, 2020
And now for a word from a sponsor… Tax season is soon to be upon us – and if you’re a small business, you know what paperwork hassles it can bring. Blue Summit Supplies is a really useful one-stop tax resource for small businesses.
Speaker: Melissa Dobbins, Founder & CEO, Career.Place
At the core of successful hiring practices is the fair and accurate evaluation of skills, abilities, knowledge and other criteria for a job. One powerful method to do this is through psychometric assessments. The right assessments used in the right way provide objective evaluation of criteria that are far more accurate than interviews alone. Unfortunately, choosing the wrong assessments or using assessments in the wrong way can lead to bad choices, biases, and even discriminatory practices that violate compliance standards.
Ask a Manager
JANUARY 7, 2020
It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. Coworker saw embarrassing content on my phone. I work in a small department library at a university, and came in to catch up on some work while the office was closed over the holidays.
Ask a Manager
FEBRUARY 17, 2020
A reader writes: I have a colleague who I depend on for data for a recurring project. Every time the update is due, I schedule check-in meetings weeks in advance and make it explicitly clear that I need X by [date] and Y by [date]. And every. single.
Ask a Manager
FEBRUARY 11, 2020
If you’re like most people, your resume is … not great. That’s not because your work history is bad or your accomplishments aren’t impressive (you are undoubtedly Very Impressive). It’s because you suck at writing a resume. Most of us do. It’s hard to be good at something you probably only do once every few years at most – and which requires you to sell yourself in a weird, unnatural-feeling way.
Ask a Manager
JUNE 12, 2019
It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. Everyone got laid off except for me. I work for a small business (3-5 employees) and I had known the company was having some financial trouble for some time. Everyone in my office got laid off except for me.
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Ask a Manager
NOVEMBER 27, 2019
To all the marketing people who keep emailing me pitches where they call grown women “girl bosses”: This is gross and sexist and you should stop. They’re women, not girls. And the default for “boss” is not male. Boss” covers all genders. You don’t need to modify it with gender, just like you wouldn’t (one hopes) say “girl pilot” or “girl lawyer.”. Or “boy boss.”.
Ask a Manager
FEBRUARY 9, 2020
It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. Should I hire an ex? My company is starting a massive and complex two-year project, which I am managing, and I’ve been given approval to hire a small support staff. We advertised publicly but after interviews we haven’t found a suitable candidate for the position which is probably most critical. Rather than advertise again given the urgency, we’ve been asked to tap our networks for candidates to interview.
Ask a Manager
FEBRUARY 11, 2020
A reader writes: I am a fairly easygoing person with one major weakness: I cannot handle it when men are condescending. After years of weathering many insufferable male friends, colleagues, boyfriends, and family members, I have simply had a lifetime’s fill of being condescended to. My tolerance has reached its limit. Now, when men in my personal life condescend to me, I get angry and fight back.
Ask a Manager
FEBRUARY 4, 2020
A reader writes: I caught my employee skipping work to nap at home when she said she was meeting with a potential client. It was total happenstance — I happened to meet the potential client at a social event that night. When I asked my employee the next day why the potential client had no idea who I was or what our company did, the truth came out: she hadn’t met with anyone, she’d gone home to take a break and a nap.
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The year 2019 in talent acquisition was full of key learnings and insights that you can leverage in order to start 2020 ahead of the recruiting pack. This report walks you through core trends to continuously examine as you plan your recruiting strategy for 2020 and beyond.
Ask a Manager
JANUARY 11, 2020
This comment section is open for any non-work-related discussion you’d like to have with other readers, by popular demand. This one is truly no work and no school.). Book recommendation of the week: Such a Fun Age , by Kiley Reid.
Ask a Manager
NOVEMBER 25, 2019
A reader writes: I manage employees who start with a three-month probationary period. I have a current probationary employee who has not taken direction well, has acted defensively and challenged basic instructions about how to do his job, has rolled his eyes when provided with feedback on how to do certain tasks, and ironically who has also sought me out for instructions in situations where the course of action for him to take should have been immediately obvious.
Ask a Manager
JANUARY 29, 2020
A reader writes: I’ve battled an eating disorder my whole life and it tends to come on when I am experiencing stress in situations that are out of my control. I recently ended my relationship with my fiancé of nine years which, as a result, triggered me to lapse back into old behavior. I thankfully saw the signs and took measures to try to alleviate the situation (not going to the gym, increasing my visits to my therapist, reaching out to friends and family for support, etc.).
Ask a Manager
FEBRUARY 11, 2020
It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. Who should clean the disgusting office fridge? I work at a small company with offices spread out through town and in my office there is just me and my coworker. Our boss works remotely from another state and comes in every few months.
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As we approach 2019, major shifts in the work environment will continue to affect the ways companies do business. Companies that are looking to attract, engage, and retain top talent should leverage these trends to create workplaces where employees thrive.
Ask a Manager
NOVEMBER 21, 2019
It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. My coworkers say we shouldn’t attend the work party we were invited to. I am a new youngish admin in a law firm that is extremely hierarchical and old school. My department’s practice group leader (PGL, the head of a certain practice in a firm) is hosting a year-end party for our department at his home, which is out of the way for the administrative staff, though most of the attorneys live on the same block.
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